Intro Psychology Rhyme
By Halford H. Fairchild
December 7, 2006
We’ve come to that point in the semester
Where a final review is done by the professor
I’m here today to give this task some time
And like you, I’ll do it – in rhyme.
My goals this semester were very modest
I wanted to share what I really thought;
To be really honest.
When it comes to this course, Introduction to Psychology,
This is what I have to say:
The human brain we now know is very diverse
It has more combinations of interlocking neurons
Then there are atoms in the universe!
The human eye is an amazing invention
Even more remarkable are our systems
For taste, smell, balance, and audition.
Pavlov’s dogs don’t tell us much
Human learning, is much more sensitive to touch
If you want to shape superstitious behavior
Give operant conditioning a try.
But when it comes to warlike behavior
I still ask, “Why?”
The issue of the war
is one on which I had to perserverate
The issue is that killing innocent people,
is something to which I cannot relate
The war says a lot
about human psychology
It’s an issue of survival of them,
And of you and of me.
Give war a chance,
is what Bush said
Something must be wrong
Up inside his head
Are a helluva mix
It’s a problem of insanity,
One that we must fix.
The chapter on memory and learning
Is one I soon forgot
How can I remember something
When I’m all tied up in a knot?
The chapter on intelligence was pretty stupid
Human intellectual capacity is infinite
Not something limited, or something insipid.
Maslow’s hierarchy has withstood the test of time
Because the self actualized individual
Only drinks the best wine.
When it comes to motivation and emotion
I couldn’t care to whistle
This theory, that theory
Go take a pissle.
Human development is something I’m still doing
But there is just one question enduring:
Do infants have as much fun in infancy
As adults do in adultery?
Sigmund Freud is a little too psycho-analytic
Let’s tell the truth about it:
Everybody is a little bit neurotic.
After reading about all the disorders
I see that I have quite a few
But now that this semester is over
I’m ready to re-new.
So as we part, now, probably for the very last time.
Let me leave you, with this little rhyme.
Practice what I’ve taught you, and I’ll say it again
Habits of Mind, are the way to begin
Come to formal settings with pen and paper in adequate supply
Take copious notes, raise your right hand,
And give your voicing your opinion, a regular try.
Read with activity, with more notes to prepare
It is through hard work and perspiration
That you creativity will flair.
When you write,
revise, revise and revise again.
You’ll see,
Your final grades will make you grin.
When you think,
Think outside of the box
And think to solve societal problems
Of which there are lots.
Lastly, struggle.
Struggle for excellence
Struggle for justice
Struggle for harmony
Struggle for peace
Peace Out!